if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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