I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
