i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize