And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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