I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
