im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
