We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize
