tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
