what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
the condom got lost in my hair
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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