Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
is this the sara with the beer cane?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Well I just put wine in my tea
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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