I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
