Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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