If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize