I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
