how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize