I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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