But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
