eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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