you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
