Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I deserve this hangover.
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