I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
