your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
