Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Randomize
