You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
