Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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