I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
