I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize