at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
