brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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