I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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