I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize