big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize