It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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