she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
