Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize