I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
