I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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