Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize