This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
