I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
