i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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