I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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