i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
