Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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