is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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