Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
