can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
