TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
