We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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