That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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