With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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